Public Frenemy #1

People everywhere are celebrating the death of Osama Bin Laden. I have mixed feelings about this whole media blitz that is currently taking over lives. So in-spite of the irony any and hilarity that is surrounding us right now I would just like to point a few things out.

1. People are celebrating somebody's death.
2. Republicans are retardedly claiming credit for his killing to work that George W. started.
3. This is a monster that we created because once upon a time the Al qeada served our interest.

Point 1 and 2 don't really need more clarity sarcasm added. So the only logical thing to do is compare the US to high school teen angst dramedy to help explain point #3.

Remember Mean Girls? Or She's all That, Never been Kissed? Basic premise; A nerdy girl is made into prom queen because it served somebody's desire for revenge or helped somebody win a bet. There is an uneasy relationship between the nerd girl and her too-cool-for-school helpers. Not quite friends, not quite enemies... Wait for it...

FREMEMIES!!!!!

Those are examples of movies you saw that made you dumber. Now for one that if you've seen it made you smarter. Charlie Wilson's War. The true story of how a senator used covert ops and garnered support for the Al Qeada because it helped free Pakistan from Soviet invasion. We(The United States) funded, trained, armed and put in place the Al Qeada because it gave us leverage in reducing Soviet(our greater enemy at the time) power. This is a fact. Bin Laden shortly after that worked for the CIA as a tactician. What did we do next? Did we help build schools over there? Did we help them build their own democracy? Did we establish them as an ally? Did we completely abandon them after they served our purpose leaving behind American resentment and replacing the Soviets on their most hated list? ding, ding ding! Osama is a way easier target for our hatred than our government though right? But the mistakes of our past led to tragedy. Not the Jihad, not the Muslim faith. Any way you slice it, The Reagan(gasp!!!) and Carter administrations started the ball rolling that led to the tragedy of 911.

Like every teen movie it all spirals down to confrontation that embarrasses the people that played with other people's lives. Try to figure out if we are the good guys in this scenario.

But we've had frememies before. Remember when we sold Saddam Hussein chemical weapons. Once again, shortly after Reagan was elected. that turned out great for us as well.

Quick shout out to the patriot act that will probably make this my most-read post to date.

Smiley Face!!!!

Ram on feminism

Heidi-ho campers!

As usual This post will start with something semi-related as an excuse to make fun of something, express my opinion and then bring you to realize how all of the thoughts seemed related while swimming around in this crazy head of mine. Today I want to talk about feminism(Gasp!), but first a story.

An old high school friend of mine looked me up through this wonderful thing called facebook. It had been about 10-11 years since we had last spoke and it is always fun to reminisce about the days when you used to run around after school and pull wild pranks and get into trouble and such. Of course the obligatory boring questions were first on the list. What are you up to nowadays? You guys have any kids? How's life... bla bla bla. She said her and her husband were still married, no kids yet etc. She also said that she was a dancer and a motivational speaker for feminism. I felt my stomach churn a little bit when I heard this. If you read the Spearhead or Citizen Renegade (both blogs fully endorsed by The Ram Spot), you would know the general point of view about feminism (that is not completely shared or endorsed by the Ram Spot... gotta keep the Bloglovin readers), is that feminism and the fembots that represent it are actually what is destroying America, ruining the dating scene for men, and is the reason for the divorce rate being so high. I wasn't sure we could be friends anymore. I responded "Feminist are kind of like Muslims. People hear that word and cringe because the worst advocates of the fem movement give the rest of them a terrible name."

Think about it. What image pops into your head when you hear the word feminist? Don't lie. It is an angry dike with a chip on her shoulder isn't it. Either that or the chick in a bandanna flexing her bicep.

Now for my personal take. My parents were staunch conservatives. I love them dearly, but I have never had the desire to take on other people's battles or judge people in situations I have never been in and don't plan to be in. For instance, the abortion issue and gay rights have always influenced what political party or candidate my parents would endorse because they think those things are wrong. Do they affect them? No not at all, but they are not going to stand for the further decline our country(in their opinion). I guess the point I'm trying to make here is that whether I agree or disagree, approve or disaprove, like or dislike feminism and the feminist movement is actually pretty irrelevent. It's not really my battle. Even though the opinion of people who have blogs matters way more because we have blogs, I'm pretty happy sitting this one out. I do however have one distinct opinion on it;

Guys... It's our fault!

This may not make me popular with the male readers... but as always I'd rather be popular with the ladies. There was a time when men were men and as the weaker sex, women needed men. Women were ok with this dynamic... shit, they preferred it. Somewhere along the line (I'm going to say around the late 60's). The idea of what it meant to be a man started to change. There started to be more fatherless children being raised by mothers, feminine pretty boys begun to embrace their rock star sex symbol status, society as a whole forced this idea that it was OK for us not provide, not protect, be gay or metro on us and we ate the whole pie. It was justification for men to make babies and not care for them, date as many women as they wanted etc. John Wayne and Humpry Bogart roll over in their grave when the Jonas Bros or Bieber are called sex symbols. Think that shit would fly in their day? The point is what the fuck did you guys expect? We abandoned women a long time ago(when it was convenient for us to) and now we are upset that they don't need or want us anymore...

That's not entirely true though. Be a man, a real man and see if the fem point of view rattles you. It won't. You will assume they are so angry at the loser-esque guys that don't handle their bidness, not you. Women need to be stronger, more confident, more opinionated nowadays. They don't have guys that are capable of taking care of them in their life. Let's all quit bitching and make ourselves a needed part of the equation again.

And for the record, I don't hate Sarah Palin because she is a woman or I am against female leaders in any sort of way. I hate her because she is stupid. I hate all stupid people equally.

Now let's interview the worlds leading feminist Ali G style!

The King of Cleveland

Sorry for the Absence peeps. Us black folk take black history month seriously. But The Ram Spot is back and better than ever. Today we have to look no further than the wide world of sports to find the next victim to fall under the dexter of blogging's knife! LeBron James.

Not to completely plagiarize an entire article I read, but a lot of quotes are necessary here. It all started when Daniel(Booby) Gibson declared himself the new "King of Cleveland at his birthday party last weekend during a champagne toast. Since LBJ's overly publicized decision to leave Ohio and "take his talents elsewhere", Cleveland has been without a true superstar or even a go to guy. They flat out suck. But, for some reason this still irked LeBron. Enough to make tweets about it.



It is pretty stupid for a guy named Booby to proclaim himself the king of anything, much less the shittiest basketball team in the league. That's like being proud that you are the smartest kid in a special needs class. But, it is even dumber for LeBron to get upset about it.

Twitter is not only the way to talk shit and air your dirty laundry, it is also the best new way to be the bigger man.



OOOOOH Snap!!!! Where's the popcorn

And how did the biggest non-story in sports end? Pretty anti-climatically. It just ended. See they realized that they were fighting over the most worthless title ever. I mean the "King of Cleveland"... Really...

It's kind of hard to pick a winner in this one. Talking shit over a tweet is soo not gangsta BronBron. I don't even have to make fun of a guy that calls himself Booby, do I? So just like when teams have a matching record at the end of the season and a complicated system determines their playoff rank, we put all this information into our number crunching computer to find out who the real "King of Cleveland' is.

And The Winner is...

Cleveland!


The friggin city is named after him for Pete's sake. No tweets, No shit-talking. How can you argue with that? Plus he's hilarious. I was about to crown myself the king of Waco, but these idiots helped me remember that Waco sucks. It really isn't better to be a big fish in a shitty pond. Because you are still, after all in a shitty pond.

Valentines Edition (Man Down)

Happy Valentines Day Peeps!

Shout out to the Bloglovin readers who are taking a break from reading about fashion and or cooking to read a healthy dose of sarcasm on this lovely day. (Ignorant assumption #1) If you sit around reading fashion and cooking blogs you are probably single and female. Thats why I would like to dedicate today's post to you lovely ladies.

For quite some time I have been one of those guys that has been notoriously and consistently single. My sisters used to call me the Mexican George Clooney (whatever that means). No one and I mean no one has ever made as much fun of his friends for being in or wanting a committed relationship (*see past post titled Hunter > Gatherer). "Girlfriends are lame", "Have you seen your nuts in a while", "Ask so and so if you can borrow your balls and come hang out tonight", "How was Grey's Anatomy last night" Just a few of the ways I would raz my friends who had girlfriends, wives or significant others. But there was one diss that stood out above the rest. "Man Down".


Love is a battlefield. A battlefield with many casualties. Your friend that used to have more time to kick it with you, drink beer and play sports is usually the most common one. A band of brothers leaves no man behind. It is our duty to tease and ridicule our fellow soldier back into his ready for "war" form. This might sound stupid. "Man Down" is the lowest tongue in cheek blow that can be dealt to one of your boys. Irony is a bitch ya'll cause this man is down. And I am not immune to the ridicule grenades I have launching at friends for years now. Big tree fall hard. It's either from a sonnet or the Taming of the Shrew, but Shakespear said for love you have to sacrifice yourself on the alter of public dignity. My real hope is that if I steal people's thunder and make fun of myself I can dodge the rest of the teasing that I have all but guaranteed will be heading my way soon. Whatever... My girlfriend hot. Be jealous bitches!

But... This is not one of those cheesy sentimental blogs it's the muthafuckin Ram Spot, and this is post is dedicated to my single female readers remember. So in short, sweet, sarcastic, to-the-point fashion: the moral to the story. It's obvious guys have their own language and if you want to get a good one and keep him you have to learn to speak it. There is one thing and one thing only that makes enduring ridicule and giving up treasured freedom worth it to guy. Blow jobs. Give them before he asks and he's yours forever.

Happy Valentines!

This Just In! People (including you) are stupid

Something dawned on me the other day when I was in office depot picking up supplies. People will believe whatever they want to. The girl at the cash register was wearing one of those ionic power bracelets. I mentioned in passing something like: "You know those things don't work, right."
"Uh... Yes they do" (picture a high school age girl rolling her eyes and one of those annoyed voices for the full effect.

Classic Ram rewind of of the story-o (insert garbled rewind sounds here)

I read multiple articles and saw a bunch of reports talking about how there was no scientific research to back the claims that these ionic bracelets and necklaces improved balance, blood flow or even affected the ions or white blood cells... Quite the opposite actually. They have little to no effect medically on the people that wear them. Not that big of a story right.

Something happened here Texas last fall, Dallas to be specific, but all of Texas. The Rangers went to the World Series and baseball became relevant again. Fans starting popping up out of nowhere. I gotta confess as a casual fan of the sport that only really follows it in the playoffs. I was completely enthralled. Only 1 other time in my life have I been that captivated by the sport and that was when Boston came back on the Yankees all those years ago. Ironically I found myself online one night after a playoff game looking up these necklaces all the players have on and was ready to spend $60 on something that gives me instant balance and power. Who wouldn't spend $60 on that? I wasn't the only one. Everywhere I went I started to notice these bracelets and necklaces being worn by just about everybody. Not only that the celebrity endorsers included Kobe Bryant, Dwight Howard, Robert Dinero, Shaq. The entire Lakers, just about every pro baseball player, Betty White, and Misses Butters worth. People swear by them. They also are in complete denial that they are the victims of a cheap parlor trick.

Research was done on these trinkets, originally to back their claims, but eventually it turned into the fact that they don't do anything at all. Want proof? Here ya go.

For the first time ever I would like to thank my short attention span. See I spent about 10 minutes shopping around for one of these on the Internet but didn't get one. There are way cooler things on the Internet. Boobs for starters. For the record I would also like to say that I am amazed at how stupid and gullible I personally can be. Let's review. A hologram charged with negative frequency can give you strength... And I believed this hook line and sinker! Fool me once shame on me... The most amazing thing is that 100% of the people I know that were stupid enough to buy one refuse to think they got ripped off. They are absolutely convinced that the bracelet works. No shit. I've thought about trying to convince them otherwise but have since changed my mind. If you believe the the force gives you Jedi powers... OK bad analogy.

The point is our mind is more powerful than we know. A trinket and a little belief can go such a long way. The funny thing is that the stock in the power band companies has been plummeting as of late. If they had marketed this the same way as a mystic crystal purchased at a PHISH concert brings you positive juju they probably would have had the same amount of success without the negative fallout. Oops

New words of wisdom.

If it needs an infomercial it probably doesn't work.

If it promises super powers it probably doesn't work.

If it says it gives you something people work really hard for with little to no effort that's just silly.

And last but not least if it promises to enhance your male parts... It can't.

Unless you truly believe in it that is.

OK fine... You caught me. I'm really just mad somebody thought of this before me. Speaking of power bands this guy could've really used one.

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Huck Finn, The N-word and why MLK is my nigga (that's right I said it)

I'm sure I didn't score any PC points with that title. I prefer to ask for forgiveness instead of permission. That's kinda my motto. As a black man trapped inside a half white half mexican body that dates a jew, I feel like I can definately comment on all of the ever present race issues. "Ram you're not black" Well, lets do the math shall we. Do I play basketball? Yes. Do I love my mama? Yes. Do I eat the shit out of chicken and watermelon? Listen to hip hop? Date white girls? Yes, yes and yes. Who are you to say I'm not black is the better question.

Recently in an atempt to make the book Huckleberry Finn more PC and less offensive several sensitivity groups have petitioned to have the N-word removed from it. The biggest opposition to this did not come from Republicans, racisist, clan members or white people. The biggest opposition to this has come from my fellow black men. Appearantly this will discredit the reality of how hard slavery was and how far things have actually come. My take; This is a very controvercial word. It's weird but in a way the fact that black people are gradually becoming less and less offended by it has helped it lose it's power. Some of the most racist things out there are things that encourage any type of segregation. BET, United Negro College Fund, Black history Month, the fact that only black people can use this word are no exception. These things segregate and hurt more than they help. I heard comedian say this so I'm not taking credit for it. There are 3 pronuciations of the N-word. G-G-E-R with clear ERR sound and over enunciation is the most offensive. You know a word is bad if it's the only word that a redneck can clearly enunciate. I think that the movement should be in the other direction. People should equally be able to use this word. Dr. King himself preached that choosing to get offended by words intended to belittle is the real problem. When I hear deflating, racist and derrogotory speech, I assume they are not talking about me. Which leads me to my next point.



Dr King fought to achieve equality. In my opinion the biggest opposition to the removal of the N-word from literature would have been MLK JR himself. That is why I have waited til today to comment on this. It is also controvercial as to whether or not MLK Day should be recognized as a holiday. Martin Luther King Jr. Accomplished many great things. Let's not forget the most important thing he accomplished... Giving me the day off from work. THIS IS NOT A RASCIST STATEMENT. I am going to celibrate the day by being as lazy as humanly possible. None of this should be about race. It should be about being awesome. Be awesome and people will always remember you. Be awesome and someday your birthday will be holiday. I had a dream too. I had mine because I was still asleep at 11:30 AM yesterday morning. Thanks Martin.

Will I get shit about writing this? If you read the whole thing maybe, maybe not. If you assume negative things assumed are assumed about you, definately. My point is we can't control what other people do or say, but we can control if we get offended by it or not. I hope the point was clearly made.

All progress is precarious, and the solution of one problem brings us face to face with another problem.
Martin Luther King, Jr.